Portland Police Catch Pampered Pig

Cars were swerving to avoid a little pet pig on Portland’s East Side. A traffic jam, at 138th and Division, an officer noticed what was causing it and called for backup to catch the culprit:

“I think it took quite a few of them to corral the sucker.”

Portland Police Lieutenant  Nathan Sheppard says this pampered Portland pet showed its true stripes: turning its snout up at unwholesome bribes.

“There were Cheeze-its,  there were Goldfish, I think Goldfish were a thing, there were a few snacks  that the pig was not very interested in.  So I guess processed food, not necessarily its thing.”

Eventually they took him out of harms way, now they’re looking for someone to come forward and claim him: they’ve given him a nice Hollywood style name.

“Clearly it is somebody’s pet and hopefully they’re able to identify, ah, Mr. Kevin Bacon there.”